Tuesday, April 25, 2006

The funnel of sound

The funnel of sound has the special properties of permeability between the current status quo and the raised measures of invention proposed by the the singers songs and corresponding upward glances. An audience used to accompany the Masters of Lyrie but they were discouraged recently when due to their lack of applause a very large opening in the ground underneath the ledge they were standing on suddenly whisked them away to places unknown. This is however not the real reason these ceremonies occur without audiences.

The presence of even an applauding audience has been known to influence the upward ethers in ways that have produced cataclymic events in the valley below. For example one year all twenty five members of the Leap Tenders association decided on a lark to accompany the Masters of Lyrie during their yearly invocation ceremony. They were a raucous bunch partying all the way up the mountain. Once seated above the main chamber they became very silent as the ceremony began. The sounds of such pure harmonies were cause for the instantaneous rapture of the entire group except for one of the members who happened to be tone deaf. This one particular misinterpreted the events below as a cause for consternation. He thought that the sky was falling which in a way it was because of the involuted currents of sound now being reflected into the chamber. Due to the immediate reflective response of the valley to these thoughts of fallings skies the participants and audience were shocked upon their return to find that the valley had indeed been flattened by what appeared to be the sky. The Masters of Lyrie were not put off for long by such ill news. They simply packed up and went about the surrounding countryside troubadouring until the following year when sans audience they made things right again.

The members of the audience did not bear the year long hiatus with the same equanimity as the Masters of Lyrie. In fact they all spent the year in prison for trying to impersonate the Masters of Lyrie. They were doing passably well in a tavern just north of the valley when their tone deaf member betrayed them by attempting to sing loudly just a point in the song where silence was caused for. Immediately they were whisked off to prison without trial. Counselors were called in to treat the patrons of the tavern for cases of ugly ear syndrome. Thankfully they recovered very quickly especially following an open free bar the next night as a token to prevent the patrons from suing the tavern owner. Due to their remarkable drinking capacity the tavern was completely drained of all its booze by three in the morning. All the patrons had passed out including the tavern owner who would not completely be restocked for another five months.


Blogger R2K said...

: )

7:14 AM  

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